Forget Virtual Assistants, Hire a Virtual Coach

This is a guest post by Jeff Popoff Reading time: 3.0 minutes (1800 words @ 600 wpm[1])

Overview

• As busy professionals we face continuous pressure to get more done in less time.

• Technology that makes us more productive also increases our pace of business.

• Could the next generation of virtual assistants or virtual coaches be right for you?

• If you are reading Personal Leadership Insight and this article you are on the right track.

Are you ready to take the virtual step?

I Was A Coaching Addict

I’m embarrassed to admit this, but I learned the hard way that the old saying is true:

"Good judgment comes from experience, experience comes from bad judgement."

I was frustrated by the costs of making mistakes. Especially by the amount of time my mistakes consumed. There had to be a better way. Eventually it dawned on me that I could leverage other people’s skills and expertise and save myself time and money. I discovered the world of coaching. Once I realized that coaches could help me achieve disproportionate gains, I became a bit of a coaching addict (or maybe a lot).

 
Yeah, I overdid it again

In the beginning, I started out modestly using coaches to help me improve my triathlon technique for the swim, bike, and run (thank you B.Gibbs, B.Chortek, T.Laughlin, Dr. Romanov, J.Friel, D.Scott). Later I branched out and used coaches in weightlifting, nutrition, and executive health (thanks Mehdi, D.McGuff, M.Sisson). Encouraged by my gains from athletic performance coaching, I experimented with a speaking coach and life coach (thanks Beth and Robyn). I have used dozens of business coaches (special thanks to Zig, Lucas, and Ramit) and even a coach for relocation (to the UK) and another for international business practices (China, India, Switzerland). I received coaching on raising venture capital, for hedge funding investing, and even how to do an IPO-roadshow (RKN.TO). I’ve used meditation coaching for stress (Adya) and completed a 12-step program to overcome my poor empathy skills (thank you Sean and CR). Today I coach a handful of start ups[2], receive ongoing peer coaching from a Mastermind[3] group, and use a supervision coach for my own coaching practice. So what’s the bottom line? In my personal development and performance, coaching has yielded a disproportionate return on investment (ROI). Other individuals report a median ROI of 3.44 times their coaching investment. At the corporate level, companies including IBM, Nike, Verizon and Coca-Cola Enterprises, report a median ROI of seven times their coaching investment.[4]

What is Virtual Coaching and What’s New?

Traditionally, individual coaching is done face-to-face and is usually confined to a fixed setting. Now that technologies like smart phones and wireless Internet can replicate the functions of an in-person session, face-to-face coaching is evolving to virtual coaching. Geographical locations and fixed schedules are no longer barriers because virtual coaching can be done via phone, video conference, email, SMS, iMessage, WhatsApp, FaceBook and a myriad of other apps.

Current Market and Technology Trends

As a reformed angel investor[5] from Silicon Valley it is second nature for me to spot trends within trends. The mobile web trend was overtaken by smart phone apps, and now apps stand poised to be overtaken by on-demand virtual assistants that use any messaging channel. Why load your device up with dozens of specific apps, when it’s easier to just message what you want? New start ups like Operator, Magic, Swell, Alfred, Zirtual, Kit and others are innovating the interface for next-gen on-demand services for both consumers and business users. Behind the curtain there is a mix of humans and artificial intelligence (think Apple’s Siri) working on your request. Their goal provide you a concierge-like experience, like having your very own virtual assistant. In addition to the above mentioned virtual assistants, the next generation of virtual coaches are emerging as well. For instance, Talkspace – the all-you-can-text therapy start up – just raised a hefty new round of $9.5 million in financing.[6]. Vida – who connects consumers with coaches and doctors – announced Series A funding of $5 million.[7] Health coaching start up Sessions was acquired by MyFitnessPal.[8] Clarity.fm provides on-demand business advice to entrepreneurs. Mindbloom ‘crowdsources’ life coaching services from your group of friends. The list goes on. Of course, this ‘virtual’ trend will have both winners and losers. For instance Google closed its Helpouts service in April 2015.[9]

A coach can help you aim higher

What a (Virtual) Coach Can And Can’t Do

Before diving deeper into virtual coaching, let’s taking a moment to recap how coaching fits into the broader scheme.[10]

• Therapists (psychiatrists, psychologists or counsellors) focus on healing dysfunction from the past.
• Consultants assess organizations, provide information, and implement solutions in the present.
• Mentors are experienced role-models and act as advisers to someone with less experience.
• Coaches focus on future performance and use questions to improve self-awareness, behaviors, and skills.

Many aspects of coaching will remain the same whether it is done in-person or virtually, such as:

• Finding the right coach for your situation.
• Setting your performance or development goals.
• On-going dialogue and feedback.
• Committing to work on your self-improvement.
• Accepting that coaching may be uncomfortable.

Nevertheless, some factors become more important in virtual coaching versus in-person coaching. Non-verbal communication cues such as body language have to be read through tone of voice or choice of words. A virtual coach has to be able discern attitude through a video call, read between the lines in text message or email, and watch for subtle clues in Facebook or WhatsApp response patterns. Other differences to bear in mind are:

• Building a trusted bond with a virtual coach may take a bit more concentration.
• Virtual coaching is a two-way dialogue. It’s a process, not a one-way Tweet to ‘fix it’.
• Multitasking during a virtual session will reduce its benefits to you.[11]
• Virtual communications usually occur in smaller bursts. Be careful not to lose the depth or context of the issue being discussed.
• Virtual coaching sessions are more flexible than “office hours”, but a regular frequency is important to keep momentum (every 2 weeks on average is optimal).[12]

Is Virtual Coaching Right For You?

Which produces a better ROI, a virtual assistant or a virtual coach?

• Virtual Assistants are a great way to outsource logistics and tactical items.
• Virtual Coaches are an effective way to increase your performance using mindset and behaviors.

Calculate your virtual return on investment[/caption]Which brings us back to the question of ROI.

• In my experience, virtual assistants yield a linear ROI
  • X dollars buys back Y amount of my time.
• On the other hand, I find that coaches (virtual or otherwise) give me a disproportionate ROI.
  • X dollars spent produces X^Y results.
  • The reason why is simple: performance gains made with a coach compound continuously over time.

Coaching Checklist

Admittedly, coaching is not for everyone and information technology is not a panacea. Before deciding if virtual coaching is right for you, first make sure you are on board with the coaching fundamentals:

1. What is your objective?
   • Are you improving your performance or your mindset? Do you want to overcome limiting behaviors or habits?
2. Is your coach good match for you?
   • Do you trust them and their references? Can they also act as your mentor? (bring relevant expertise to the table).
3. What is your commitment?
   • Are you prepared to put in the time, energy and work between coaching sessions to achieve new levels of success?
4. Are you coachable?
   • Are you willing to do things differently and break away from your patterns that produce average results? Will you hold yourself accountable to your coach and your agreed actions?

Virtual Coaching Checklist

1. The number one factor to consider in virtual coaching is your level of technology savvy. Are you comfortable doing video conferencing or instant messaging by yourself or do you require IT support?[13]
2. Does it fit your personality type? Studies show that introverts tend to perform well in electronic conversations, and even prefer a healthy distance over face-to-face conversations.[14] (Note: If your goal is to develop your interpersonal skills, this medium is not congruent with that goal).
3. Can you build bonds and express yourself easily in writing? Aside from audio and video, much of your communication with your coach will be in asynchronous text.[15]
4. Can your coach keep up with you? Can they follow your train of thought as you shift between phone, text, Skype, Facebook, WhatsApp, Twitter DM, and a myriad of other apps? Response times and availability are key factors when coaching across multiple time zones and geographies. Is your coach available 7 days a week? Do they offer a guaranteed response time for communications between scheduled sessions?

As I confessed from the start, I am a believer in the benefits of coaching and its exciting to see technology extending these benefits to busy people on the go. I hope you found this article useful, and would appreciate it if you commented below with your thoughts and suggestions.

About the Author

• Jeff is a successful executive who has served as Vice President in a Fortune 500 company as well as several Silicon Valley startups. He has been a guest speaker at UCLA Anderson and Berkeley Haas and is a graduate of Harvard PON and Stanford GSB.[16]
• He has figured out how to increase individual business performance using better health in less time. Warning: Unintended side effects include looking better and living longer.
• You can learn how at The Healthy Executive.

Before and after I became an executive health coach

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1. Do You Read Fast Enough To Be Successful?, Forbes ↩
2. SpartUp Accelerator ↩
3. 7 Reasons To Join A Mastermind Group, Forbes ↩
4. ICF Global Coaching Client Study ↩
5. Jeff’s profile on AngelList ↩
6. Text therapy startup raises $9.5 million, CNN Money ↩
7. Mobile health startup Vida, Silicon Valley Business Journal ↩
8. Digital Health Coaching Startup Acquired, Fast Company ↩
9. Google Helpouts is Shutting Down, Forbes ↩
10. Harvard Business Review Research Report ↩
11. The Myth of Multitasking, C.Rosen ↩
12. Coaching Frequency Study, Coaching Research Institute ↩
13. p.295 Advancing Executive Coaching, Gina Hernez-Broome, Lisa A. Boyce, 2010 ↩
14. Hubschman 1996, Hamilton & Scandura 2003 ↩
15. Giadagno & Caildini, 2002 ↩
16. Jeff’s credentials on LinkedIn here and Facebook here. ↩

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photo credits: Defining targets differently via photopin (license), [ROI photo: Got Credit]

Skill Assessment: Joys and Discomforts of a New Leadership Position

Congratulations.  You have been promoted to a management position you have been hoping to receive for quite some time.  You have set goals, worked hard, kept your nose clean, excelled in your former positions and you finally made it.  Now, the hard work begins.  How do you motivate your staff to give their best?  How do you help your team see you as a team leader (when you have been a peer up until now)?  How do you manage your time to accommodate all the extra tasks on your plate?  How do you make decisions like a leader?  How do you coach people?  How do you let people know they have to be let go?

You certainly need more education and experience to handle all of these situations.  It does matter.  The number one reason why people leave a job is because their boss did not know how to lead.  The quality of the boss/leader/supervisor/manager/team leader is one of the single most influential elements on the quality of life in a workplace.  You want (and need) to be in the category of “great boss.”  I encourage you to be very self-aware of your strengths and weaknesses as a leader and work to develop in your areas of need.

Today we will look at five behaviors of effective new leaders that are vital to their success by looking at Julie.  She has just been promoted to a new management position at a bank and is doing a great job.  Her team trusts her.  She is sending her division of the bank in the right direction.  How is Julie accomplishing this?  Following are five insights:

1. Julie let go of the thoughts and processes she had as a team member. She learned quickly how to put decisions, emails, conversations, etc. through the filter of leadership. Her experience as a team member is certainly beneficial. However, decisions as a team leader can be more complex, weighty and require a more measured approach.

2. She asks questions when necessary. Julie understands that she was not hired to be perfect and because she knew everything. She was hired because she was an exceptional team member and because she had the potential to be a highly trusted leader. Julie looks for opportunities to sharpen her leadership skills.

3. Julie knew going in to the position that there would be push back from two groups of people – those individuals she used to be team members with and those individuals on her new team with more experience and/or age. She focuses on not taking offense to these dynamics, nor does she allow them to apply unnecessary stress on her work life. She takes every push back, big or small, in the proper context and stays focus on the work at hand.

4. Julie expects to have to continue to earn trust. She does not assume that her position included an instantly high trust level from everyone. This allows her to lead by example – working harder than her team, showing up early, leaving late, sticking to commitments, etc. She maintains her work-home life balance; being a leader doesn't equal zero home life. However, she is a living example of the old saying that no leader should ask his/her followers to do anything they are not willing to do also.

5. She was a likable, personable person before the promotion, but has worked hard to increase these traits. She forgives first, trusts others quickly, replies to requests of her time/attention quickly, listens actively, doesn't make other people fight for her time/attention, encourages and builds up her team genuinely and often, coaches her team members in privacy, and is a source of optimism in the office, etc. Julie is a meaningful source of joy for not only her team, but for the bank as a whole.

I experienced push-back from my co-workers when I took one of my first jobs soon after college.  I had a Senior Director position and two of the Directors (less pay, but more experience and older) actually set me down individually to let me know I had no say over what they did.  It was a rude awakening to work life as a team leader, but I didn't let it tarnish my excitement or my commitment and passion to providing great leadership for that office.  Congratulations on your new position.  There aren't many parts of professional life more meaningful or significant than being a leader others want to follow.

Skill Assessment: Solar System Leadership Lessons

A simple, fresh metaphor is a powerful tool in gaining clarity on what's important and meaningful. Leadership is a complex and diverse subject. Following is a look at how basic, effective leadership and team motivation works.

The players in this metaphor are the sun, moon and earth (it's difficult to find a more basic and simple metaphor). The earth represents each team player. It is an intricate entity comprising of a million moving parts - much like each person on your team. It does work, provides value, is difficult to keep in good working shape and exists in its present form because of one primary energy source - the sun.

The sun, obviously, is the earth's energy source and represents a team player's energy source - motive. Each person is motivated wholly by a complicated mix of inputs, but the lesson here is that leadership is not the primary motivator. The source driving action is personal motive.

So, what does the moon represent? This is where the team leader enters the picture. He or she uniquely plays the same role as the moon in the ecosystem. Visually, the moon reflects the sun's light. It is similar, yet all together different from the earth. And it influences certain movements on earth - i.e. the tides. An effective team leader does the same. He or she works hard to reflect back to the team their core motives. He or she is self-aware of the similarities they have with the team, but also recognizes core differences. And, of course, the leader's work (and primary utility) revolves around positively influencing the team's actions.

I think one of the biggest ah-ha moments this metaphor serves up is the recognition that neither the leader nor the team players are at the center of the ecosystem. That position is held squarely by motive. When leaders try to play this role they become overbearing, self-centered and out-of-whack with how true leadership and motivation work. When team players try to fill this position, they aren't in tune with their role within the organization.

Remember this solar system metaphor next time you are attempting to either build a high-performing team, fix one that's off kilter, or working hard to take a team from average to excellent. Continue to sharpen your understanding of each team member's authentic motives, be a reflective model of positive motives and keep those motives as the center of your team's ecosystem.

Tweet this post - @pli_leadership

Skill Assessment: The "Ready to Serve" Elected Student Leader

Hundreds of our clients are student organizations.  Places where young leaders learn the joys and discomforts of "being in charge". If you are a student leader, think deeply about how your actions and thoughts align with the follow two keys to success and my specific tips for each.  If you have direct influence over a student leader, please share these.

1. There is a difference between the skills it takes to get elected and the skills it takes to serve.  Go into your year of service with a growth mindset.  Be open to coaching and sharpening of your skills.  You will receive instruction you will need this year and that you can use for a lifetime.  Don't miss it.

Take notes, ask for specific feedback, don't make excuses, work to improve, mirror success you see around you, take responsibility, be honest with your weaknesses, be humble with your strengths.

2. A team of talented leaders does not make a talented team; that takes a team of talented team-focused leaders.  Serve each other just as passionately and purposefully as you serve the members.  Leaders leading leaders is difficult because of big personalities, people not afraid to speak their mind, people used to getting their way, etc.  This can lead to disagreements, arguments and hurt feelings.  Just know those are growing pains to success.  Work through them, not around them.  If you contribute positively to your team mates, your "team" will last much longer than one year. 

Don't try to earn the approval or attention of your team - give yours generously to them first, celebrate each other's success, encourage publicly, say thank you, listen actively, spend time together even when you don't have to, be nice, give constructive comments in private, sacrifice for each other, build your team mates up with your words when they aren't around, randomly call to say hi, say I'm sorry, invest time really getting to know them.

Good luck and let us know how we can help!

Skill Assessment: Performance Capacity and Quality of Life

Performance capacity is your level of available resources to accomplish tasks.  These resources might include time, knowledge, dexterity, etc. Increase your performance capacity and you increase the likelihood that you will do better work, more work and more enjoyable work.  How do you increase performance capacity?  This is a question on every effective leader, manager and contributing team member's mind.  There are many ways - coaching, training, proper job placement, attending conferences, effective management of resources, etc. However, I believe that if you improve your quality of life you will also improve your performance capacity. 

Quality of life is the alignment of your expectations/desires and the reality of your life.  I.e. - if your work day is going as you expected it to go, your quality of life is higher.  If you are paid what you desire, your quality of life goes up.  If your family treats you and other people as you expect, your quality of life goes up.  Your quality of life factors into performance capacity because a good portion of the resources you need to accomplish tasks effectively are emotional.  These commonly discussed elements include attitude, patience, focus, empathy, happiness, etc.  Your emotional components are fueled by how you feel about your life and the situations and people in it. So, how do you improve your quality of life?  How do you bring a tighter alignment between the expectations/desires and the reality of your life?  Check back for more...

Skill Assessment: Components of Reaching Excellence

I enjoy the light travel load August brings for many reasons: family time, dedicated office time, space to work on writing songs and, most importantly, time to sharpen my iPad/iPhone game skills. One of the games filling my rec. time this season is called Aqueduct. It is a complexing puzzle challenge that takes time to move through and requires certain skills to master.

Isn't personal and professional success the same? The following list contains eight components necessary for reaching excellence in activities ranging from guilty pleasures like Aqueduct to meaningful pursuits like being great at your job.

The 8 P's of Reaching Excellence

1. Prior experience - Excellence today is a fruit growing on the tree of yesterday's hard work.
2. Passion - This hard work is fueled by a love for your craft. All actions have self-motivation at their core. All great actions have passion at their core.
3. Practice - The skills you need to rock to reach excellence in your area are muscles that need to be exercised. Greatness in the public is born from hours of practice in private.
4. Perfection - I actually believe perfection is the enemy of excellence. However, a game like Aqueduct is a reminder that in many pursuits there is a gold standard; a goal to be reached; a method for knowing whether you've hit success or not. Excellence can only be reached if you have identified what it looks like and go after it with perfection driving your journey.
5. Pliable - This skill is essential when you have firm performance metrics in place. Goals change, people get in the way, life happens, etc. Flexibility to adjust on the fly is critical for remaining on top of your game (and staying sane).
6. Produce - Although relatively assumptive, it is important to highlight that excellence isn't just something you are, it is what you do. You have to produce. You have to go to market. You have to get the deal done.
7. Patience - Success doesn't happen overnight and excellence doesn't happen "overyear". It takes (sometimes) many years of continual work to be exceptionally great at something. Also, this is an active patience. You aren't waiting on it to happen. You are just doing your job and doing growth right and excellence happens over time.
8. Pursuit - Focused, laser-focused pursuit. Steve Jobs, the Apple (now former) CEO, is a shining example of the power of focused pursuit. He led Apple with a dedicated pursuit of making products that spoke to our creative, functional, inspired, human and beautiful needs. Your excellence may not lead a $330 billion company, but that doesn't diminish it's importance - to you or the people and projects you influence.

If you have room to grow (i.e. - you are breathing), examine your life and see which of these eight components needs more of your attention.

Skill Assessment: What Is Your Hole #3?

We all have strengths and weaknesses. It is a defining part of the human experience. However, certain weaknesses impact our ability to positively lead others more than others. These weaknesses can become our "Hole #3".

I used to play golf all the time. Ten years ago it wouldn't be uncommon for me to play 50-60 rounds per season. The last few years I was lucky to get 5-6 rounds played per year. 2010 was one of those years.
In October I dusted off the clubs for a round with my great friend and speaking partner, Kelly Barnes. It was a magical round... except for hole #3. It was a great day on the links. All pars and bogeys (great for me), except for one double-bogey and a disaster on hole #3. I scored a 13 on that one hole! It was a train wreck. It was so bad Kelly and I were not even going to score it - hence the scratches. If I had even bogeyed that hole, I would have scored a 79 and achieved something I have only done twice in my golfing career - breaking 80. Needless to say, I ended an otherwise great day of golf very, very frustrated.
As leaders, we are expected to deliver results - i.e. birdies and pars. However, if we have even one glaring weakness or shortcoming (one Hole #3), it can diminish our effectiveness and make many of our strengths irrelevant.

Fortunately, leadership (unlike golf) is a team sport. The best leaders are surrounded with people who are strong where he or she is weak. Yet, a Hole #3 type weakness can still hold us back and block our leadership's full power, scope and range. The following grid shows how you can have 9 of the 10 vital components of great leadership and still fall short of your potential.

Click to view larger version

The abbreviations are the PLI Leadership Essentials.

Examine your skills. Be honest with yourself. What is a weakness you possess that has a Hole #3 type meaningfulness? Find it and begin today working on growing, changing and improving. At the end of the day, a 79 might only be 7 strokes from an 86, but those 7 strokes might mean the difference between being a leader who is an "also played" and a leader who is a game-changer. One that is leaving a legacy of excellence, remarkable results and a life-changing score for those you serve.

Skill Assessment: The Downsides of Experience

I recently sat through a high-level meeting where I was consulting a company on their corporate communication techniques. The key leaders in the room were discussing some of their main value statements. A major point for most of their future clients was their experienced staff. I.e. the more years their staff had, the more trusted, credible and valuable the organization became.

This is a well-used and, in most cases, valid characteristic for companies and organizations. However, it is also one that carries with it problems. Here are a few of the top issues:

1. Experience does not always equal expertness. A simple example is my golf game. I have been actively playing golf for 17 years. However, my skill level is that of a five-year golfer. I.e. the value of the number 17 is not reflected in my golfing ability. How many people do we know like this? They have been in the industry for 20 years, but they aren't any more knowledgeable, skilled or valuable than they were 10 years ago.

2. The cost of experience (in some cases) is higher than the received value. Experienced staff are expensive. They demand a higher salary. They aren't always willing to adopt new practices, more efficient technologies or industry changes. Experienced staff can tightly align their job behavior with their job description. They aren't as willing to go above and beyond for the company as they did when they were younger.

A great example is a friend of mine who recently started teaching at a small school. She contacted me after a few months there and asked for some advice on how to respond to a difficult situation. More than one veteran teacher approached her privately and suggested she stop being so excited, creative and hard-working. These experienced, higher-paid educators were actually costing the school more than they were worth not only because they were complacent with their job, but because they were also strong arming the newbies to basically stop making them look bad by working so hard.

Two takeaways from this lesson:

a.  If you are an experienced staff member, think back to the "rookie you."  Were you more energetic?  Thirsty to learn?  Open to new ideas?  If so, recapture that spirit.  Combine it with your current knowledge level, advanced industry understanding and deep network.  You will see marked improvement in efficiency, new ideas, output and value.

b. If you are a manager, supervisor, boss, etc., make sure you equally evaluate, coach and serve your experienced staff and your recent hires. Experience has its upsides, but the downsides demand your attention, as well.

Skill Assessment: Your Leadership Fingerprint

Your influence as a leader is your leadership fingerprint. It defines who you are as a manager of people and projects. A recent meeting with a client organization highlighted a short list of behaviors you do not want defining your influence. While brainstorming a project idea with my client's work team, the division leader came in. We needed the leader's approval before we could move forward. What happened next was a disheartening display of ineffective leadership...

Behaviors to Avoid as a Leader:

1. He stared at his cell phone the entire time. He used it to check something at the start of the interaction, but then continued to handle it and focus on it. (You need your eyes and attention on the people, ideas and process in the room.)

2. He never asked probing questions to learn more about our ideas. He also never asked for the up sides of the project. He only repeated the down sides. (You need to exude optimism and a supportive, creative energy during brainstorming sessions. Especially when your team's ideas and enthusiasm are at stake.)

3. He immediately told us the idea wouldn't work and repeated that mantra the entire time. (You need to be realistic and practical, but add as many positive ideas to the discussion as you can. Then if things aren't panning out, massage the discussion to "meet in the middle" ideas.)

4. He never sat down to engage in a conversation. He stood, talked at us and then left. (You have an immediate barrier when you walk in - i.e. boss vs. team. This barrier creates negative outcomes (intimidation, average ideas, muted creativity, etc.) unless you break it down and level the emotional and hierarchy playing field. Have a seat and join in.)

5. He never gave an official answer. He relied on the "read through the lines" approach of decision making. (You ultimately need to make a decision. Sometimes on the spot. Make it with class and a spirit of "we did this together".)

Being the leader isn't easy. It's even more difficult when your influence strategies are broken. Examine your style and your methods. If they include any of these, make a change. Your team is silently begging you to.

Remember, it's not about you. It's not even about them. It's about the work. Make it great.

Skill Assessment: Four Big Questions to get in G.E.A.R.

One of the primary purposes of leadership conferences and classes is to inspire people to get their leadership in gear. This initiative is obviously close to my heart and one that makes a dramatic impact. As we motivate and inspire conference participants or leadership students to make a difference, there are four key questions we need to help them with. Their answers to these questions and our sage advice on how to answer them provides the foundation and fuel needed to get their leadership in gear.


Four Questions to get in G.E.A.R.
(And a few key anchor words...)

Grounded - Why are you here?

This question is not about why they are at the conference or in the class (although that is important). It is about why they are anywhere. What is your purpose in life? Leaders who understand, are deeply connected with and stay grounded to their core purpose are more likely to get and stay in gear. This purpose must align with your deepest values and beliefs. Why are you here? The answer to this question gives life meaning.

Engaged - What do you create?

Highly effective leaders are results-oriented. They are greatly concerned with making things happen, creating change and leaving everywhere they go and everyone they connect with a little better than they found them. They are excellent at creating cool, interesting and meaningful stuff; which in turn attracts people with those same qualities. What do you create? The answer to this question gives life direction.

Authentic - Who are you?

Self-awareness is critical to good leadership. You must understand your strengths, weaknesses, talents and skills before you can fully lead. Highly effective leaders are so true to who they are, their "leaderly" actions become second nature. This allows them to genuinely place their time and attention on others. People are starving for leaders who are authentic, bold and caring. Who are you? The answer to this question gives life clarity.

Relationship-focused - Who is on your team?

Life and leadership are team sports. Engaged leaders have identified, understand the importance of and spend time cultivating the relationships in their life. This includes people following them and people they follow. They put relationships first and results second. Who is on your team? Answering this question gives life joy.

If you are a leadership teacher, trainer or conference organizer, invest time examining your curriculum, material and speakers and make sure these four critical questions are addressed.

Step one is to know your personal answer to each. Here are mine:


1. Why are you here?

To bring glory to God through my relationships and my leadership teachings.

2. What do you create?

Personally, I create harmony and security for my wife and daughters. Professionally, I create a tribe of inspired and motivated students, educators and professionals armed with better tools for getting their leadership in gear.

3. Who are you?

I am a Christian, American, husband, father, speaker, author, blogger, singer-songwriter and epic fajita artist. I am more than what I do though. I am what I believe, who I spend my time with, what I read/watch/listen to and what I think. I work hard to align all of those elements with my answers to #1 and #2.

4. Who is on your team?

My most important team mates are Jesus Christ, my wife Ashley, and my daughters Vivian and Addison (and soon-to-be Emerlyn Kate :). Ashley and I's immediate family, friends, peers, church family and long-time clients also play a vital role on my team. All my audience members, clients, and suppliers comprise the rest of my team. They are all a joy to work with and make my team exciting, colorful and ever expanding.

How about you?


- Posted from Rhett's iPhone on tour in San Diego.

Location:Harbor Island Dr,San Diego,United States

Skill Assessment: What Type of Leader Are You?

Are you a Cosmetic, Slim•Fast or Healthy Leader?

[A cosmetic person's quality of life is driven by their looks.]

The Cosmetic Leader is only interested in looking good and making surface only improvements. Their focus is primarily self. They think that as long as they look good, people will follow them. They are like everyone else in the fact that they have blemishes, but they spend their energy finding new and more creative ways to cover them up instead of working hard to overcome their shortcomings.


[A Slim•Fast person's eating habits are driven by the latest diet fad and they do not invest time exercising or eating healthy.]

The Slim•Fast Leader is mostly transactional with their leadership. They keep track of good deeds others do or don't do and treat them accordingly. They are one-sided with their development and only focus on leading other's growth, not investing time in self-improvement. They look good, but never really do any of the hard work necessary to create real, meaningful change. They avoid difficult conversations, are risk-averse, too prideful to seek coaching, etc. The Slim•Fast Leader is certainly better off than the Cosmetic Leader, but their systems and philosophies hold them back from creating real, meaningful change in themselves and others.


[The healthy person exercises and eats right.]

The Healthy Leader is a leader inside and out. They look good on the outside as a result of doing the work necessary to be good on the inside. They also demonstrate and promote healthy leadership in themselves and others by doing the hard, dirty, unpopular work that the Cosmetic and Slim•Fast Leaders avoid. They are balanced in their approach to life, growth, time management, priorities, etc. Healthy Leaders serve as selfless role models for the benefits of living a clean, powerful and positive life.



- Posted using my iPhone.

Skill Assessment: Vital Questions

Many times your effectiveness is based on your ability to know which questions to ask. Here a few vital leadership questions you should be reflecting on regularly:

Am I coachable?
How do I respond to feedback?
Am I fully committed to my leadership duties?
Do I represent the best of my organization?
Am I supporting and encouraging the people around me?
Do my words, body language and attitude lift others or bring them down?
How can I be my best today?


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Skill Assessment: Grow Into Who You Used To Be

I have the great privilege once again of speaking to my alma mater this afternoon - Oklahoma State University.  I will have 75 leaders from across the campus in Tulsa for two hours.  The program is one I created a few years back called the Unmade Leader.  The concept is very simple - leaders are born and then unmade.  It is based on research and observations that as young people we have many traits that make us great leaders.  Then over time, because of pride, failures, peer pressure, misguided priorities, etc., those traits become diluted, diminished or deleted.

The program today is built on seven specific traits we tend to lose as we age, get more educated and/or get more experienced.  Two examples are energy and trust.  Being young is synonymous with having a ton of energy.  Age naturally changes this.  However, great leaders are able to defy nature and maintain an energetic mind, body and spirit. This allows them to not only get more done, but also inspire others to do the same.  A positive, active attitude is highly contagious. 

Our perspective of trust also changes as we grow older, more educated and more experienced.  The major change that negatively impacts leadership effectiveness is thinking you are above the laws - both the small and big ones.  There is an innocence that we lose over time that distorts our thinking about how we do life.  We think that because we are adults or professionals we can bend rules.  A small example is responding to voice mails or emails.  When you get a request from someone, it is not only unprofessional, but also damaging to your trust account to allow a long period of time to pass before you respond.  The distorted thinking is, "my time and attention is more valuable than your need for even a small portion of it."  This is your ego getting in the way of good manners and trust building.

The big challenge of this afternoon's program will be to "grow into who you used to be."  Many times we are so focused on learning more, doing more, getting more education, getting more professional development, etc. when the reality may be that you need to start forgetting some ways you have learned and grow back into the powerful leader you used to be. 

By the way, the other five leadership traits that become diluted, diminished or deleted over time are:  optimism, decisiveness, authenticity, appreciation and growth.

Skill Assessment: The Quintessential Success Trait

What does it take to reach success in any field?

I believe it entirely depends... if you are trying to fully explain each high-achiever's individual success. The most common traits that show up on these lists include determination, luck, hard-work, timing, passion, intelligence, networking, etc.

However, upon closer examination you will find there are a few commonalities.

My day job for the past 10 years has been teaching people how to be better leaders and, ultimately, how to do life better. Therefore, I have spent thousands of hours studying, examining and thinking about success and how to help people get there and stay there. Through this I have discovered a very powerful common trait among successful people.

I call this common trait... The Threshold Thread.

The Threshold Thread is a concept I have developed to frame the quintessential success trait of high achievers. They all have developed the ability to push their capacities further than the average person. They have expanded, enhanced and empowered -- this is the threshold part -- a large variety of skill areas -- this is the thread part, this capacity is woven throughout many aspects of their life.

The Threshold Thread concept leaves us with many questions:

• How did they achieve this capacity expansion ability?
• Who are some specific examples of The Threshold Thread?
• What are the most common skill areas high-achievers have pushed the threshold in?
• How does this concept gel with the success concept of getting highly skilled in one or two very focused areas?
• What is preventing the average person from achieving this?

These are the questions I will be challenging you to think about and work through over the next few posts as we close out 2009 here at the Personal Leadership Insight blog. Keep checking in for more...

Motivate with Direction

In my many travels this month (eight days of trainings in Oklahoma, two in Boston, two in Springfield MO, one in Nashville TN, and one in Las Cruces NM), a recurring question popped up:

How do we get people motivated to act?

This question was stated to me via four questions:

1. How do we get our student leadership board to take action?
2. How do we get our adult teachers/advisers to start using technology?
3. How do we get our field managers to adopt new practices?
4. How do we get and keep our team members engaged in our monthly leadership study?

Although each situation requires different approaches, the basic strategy has one common thread: Your average person needs specific and clear direction in order to be motivated to act. It would nice (and easier) if everyone was internally motivated to constantly scan each situation and asking "how can I help out right now in the most meaningful and purpose-filled way?" However, we know two things are absolutely certain: 1) Leadership is not easy and 2) the reason leadership development is so important is because most people will default to their average behavior unless and until their better self is inspired to act. This direction that people need comes in many different forms, as well. Here are the suggestions given to the situations listed above:

1. How do we get our student leadership board to take action? Make sure there is a clear and trusted leader in the group - either a highly-equipped adult or peer leader will work. Then give the team either concrete and/or abstract responsibilities. Make sure you "inspect what you expect." Remember, it is pointless to get frustrated that the board isn't behaving in a certain way when they haven't been told how to behave.
2. How do we get our adult teachers/advisers to start using technology? Fear and purpose are the two big enemies here. Your average, mature human brain is very fearful of change. The best antidote for this fear is compelling purpose (second best is good ole' fashion basic training.) If you can demonstrate how the new technology will help them do their core job functions better, faster and more efficiently, then they will be more willing to get on board.
3. How do we get our field managers to adopt new practices? Same strategy as number two.
4. How do we get and keep our team members engaged in our monthly leadership study? Give them duties. This strategy is similar to how you can increase attendance at monthly member meetings or your garden variety social/family gathering. If you delegate small tasks (bring something, make something, create something, etc.), people will feel a higher sense of ownership in the event, as well as feel a higher sense of responsibility. Its easier to just not show up than it is to not show up AND be the one that didn't do something.

Teaching PLI: PLI Required Reading List

There is a great new book titled "The 100 Best Business Books of All Time." The authors have put together a fabulous collection and did a great job in the book of summarizing the main points of these classics and new-classics. I personally have my reading to-do list done for the year, as I have only read 31 of the 100.

The other great benefit of this book to our PLI teachers and trainers is that it inspired a "PLI Required Reading List." This list certainly isn't all-inclusive, but it is a great place to start to get your students doing some out-of-class, non-curriculum PLI reading.

Again, the following books are all in Jack and Todd's new book. So, you can get a quick synopsis of each by reading their new book. Click on the ^ after each to go directly to that book's 800CEOREAD page, where you can read about the book and/or buy it. If there is more than one book listed in an Essential, I put an * to donate the one I would recommend most.

Vision
Control Your Destiny or Someone Else Will^
What Should I Do With My Life?*^

Integrity
Questions of Character^

Innovativeness
The Art of Innovation^
The Innovator's Dilemma^
Orbiting the Giant Hairball*^
The Creative Habit^

Wise Judgement
Influence*^
The Power of Intuition^

Service Mindedness
(This being a business book list, there isn't a book about service leadership. All the service books listed are about customer service.)

Goal Processing
Getting Things Done^

Skill Assessment
Now, Discover Your Strengths^

Emotional Maturity
Emotional Intelligence^

Fostering Relationships
How to Win Friends and Influence People*^
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team^
The Team Handbook^

Masterful Communication
Made to Stick*^
The Story Factor^
Never Give In!^

Following is a list of the books that I would recommend you have your students read, but they just don't fit nicely into one of the Ten Essentials:

General
The Leadership Challenge^
Leadership Is An Art*^
The Leadership Moment^
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People^

Skill Assessment: Your Career Insurance Policy

No matter what condition the economy is in or what misc. talent/information/skill set you might be currently lacking, if you are these two things you will always be in demand:

1. A hard worker.
2. Fun to be around.



Processing Questions for PLI Curriculum Teachers/Trainers:

1. Why is hard work always touted as a key to success? Produce at least one historical case study and one case study from your circle of friends, family members and/or community members.

2. Is "being fun to be around" really valuable if you are involved in serious projects, activities, jobs, etc.? Defend your opinion.

3. What careers have historically been the most "recession-proof" over the past 50 years? Which ones will be over the next 50 years? Site your sources.

4. How are you personally on the TRAX Scale with being a hard worker and being fun to be around?

Please visit www.yournextspeaker.com for more leadership development.

Skill Assessment: Shining a Light on the Torchbearer Concept

A Torchbearer is a passionate and highly-skilled organizational ambassador. Their "organization" could be personal, professional or third-place in nature.

(Third places include hobbies, associations, volunteer efforts, etc. Anything not directly associated with their home life or their work life. Starbucks if you will.)

The list below breaks down the seven defining characteristics of a Torchbearer and includes strategies for moving your staff, volunteers, or student leaders away from the dark side and closer to the bright light of the Torchbearer world. Some of them are pre-filters (I.e. - while picking your people, look for these qualities.) Some of them are developmental in nature.

A Torchbearer...

1. Is thirsty for helping organization grow.
Powerful Torchbearers are servants. It is in their nature to help others for the sake of helping others. Although the basic behaviors can be taught, the internal "servant compass" is developed from a young age. Look for people who have it.

2. Owns a strong allegiance to organization.
Pure allegiance is a powerful force. Think soldiers. Think father-daughter relationships. Think a person of faith. You want people who will stick with your organization through the good, bad and ugly. The mechanisms of allegiance include self-interest, loyalty to relationships, shared experiences and common values and beliefs. These are all emotional elements. How are you making an emotional connection with your people?

3. Values and fosters relationships within organization.
Of all the allegiance elements, the relationships piece is the most powerful. People may join organizations because of material gains, but they voluntarily commit blood, sweat and tears because of relationships. If you are trying to mobilize a volunteer staff, don't send out a form letter to the membership body. Get ten inner-circle folks to each call thirty Torchbearers-in-Training they either have a relationship with or are willing to form one with.

4. Gains part of identity from organization.
Where do you see this in every day life? An NFL football game in Pittsburgh with thousands of fans waving their Terrible Towels. 3:00 pm at a middle school with every mini-van plastered with stickers announcing their children's academic accomplishments or sports team affiliation. Anyone accessorized in clearly designer bling-bling. These folks are all visually and vocally proud of their connection with their sports team, 13-year old or Prada shoes. You need to ask yourself, what are the personal benefits a member of your organization would receive from being vocal and visual with their affiliation with you and have you provided them the means to do so? I.e. - how can you be upset about no one shouting your message when you keep all the megaphones in the closet?

5. Clearly understands role in organization.
One of the simplest ways to get someone engaged in your organization - give them something to do. The clearer the instructions and the amount of time/money/skills they will need to do it, the better.

6. Knows and believes in organization's core values.
If we refer back to the allegiance elements, we see that common values and beliefs is a driving force in getting people to go to battle with you and for you. Common values and beliefs are so foundational to the DNA of an organization, that many times we forget to shout them from the rooftop. If you are going to really get the best from your Torchbearers, you need to constantly remind them of the deeper, wider and more significant reasons why your organization and their work for it are, not just important, but vital.

7. Speaks positively about organization, its leadership and members.
This final characteristic is very similar to the servant-minded one - either someone is in the habit of talking positively or they aren't. Research actually states that our optimist/pessimist nature is both ingrained in our DNA and a function of the environment of our early developmental years. Find people who are built with a positive bent. A price cannot be placed on the value of the subtle and forceful work they do to bring other people into the fold. However, even the most positive soul needs something to say. It is your job to continually push the good news of your organization and ideas on how to use them.

Google the books The Tipping Point, Tribes and Bowling Alone for even more great info on this topic area.

 

Processing Questions for PLI Teachers/Trainers:

1. What are organizations are you a member of and do you know: why they exist, who formed them, when they were formed, what are their greatest strengths, what are their great shortcomings, and what role you play in each? List all six answers for each of your organizations.

2. When we think about "organizations" in the context of Torchbearers, why do we include not only tradition school-based, community-based organizations, but also peer groups, your family, your hobbies, etc.?

3. Read one of the above mentioned books, write a 5-minute speech on the biggest lessons you learned from it and deliver the speech in class.

Skill Assessment: Guts

"If you don't have the guts to be honest or the cooth to know how to pull it off without making us want to slap you across the forehead with a two-by-four, please let someone else be in charge."
Your People

Processing Questions for PLI Curriculum Teachers/Trainers:

1. Have you ever been in a situation in which the leader created more anxiety within the group members than they relieved?

2. What are some ways the leader could have resolved the issues without creating added anxiety to the group?

3. Why is it hard to let someone else take the reins on a project that you have started?

4. It is hard to step down from a leadership position, but it is sometimes the best mode of action for a group. What are some ways that group members can help to ease this difficult transition process?

Skill Assessment: Five Skills to Practice Today

1. Talk up about people not in the room. It will build trust with those that are in the room.

2. Talk more about solutions than challenges. Your primary job function as a leader is to creatively solve problems (seen and unseen).

3. Smile more and be nice to people. One of the main purposes of your leadership should be to be an encouraging and uplifting force.

4. If you are a talker, listen more. If you are a listener, talk more. Be balanced.

5. Tell your team about the high expectations you have for them. People will only give you their best when they know A) What the best looks/feels like, B) They have someone consistently helping them get there.

Processing Questions for PLI Curriculum Teachers/Trainers:


1. How often would you say you practice these skills?

2. Why is important to have an enumerated list of skills to practice each day?

3. What are some ways to practice being an encouraging and uplifting force to group members?

4. Do you consider yourself a talker or a listener?

5. How can you create a balance between the two?